Understanding Cocaine Addiction and Recovery in South Africa
When you first use cocaine socially, it may very well seem fun and a great way to let your hair down. However, before long, you may find that you are using cocaine to combat your feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy – without even realising it! This is when we find that our clients have been using cocaine not to ‘get high,’ but rather just to feel “good enough”. Good enough to get out to bed, to go to work, good enough to interact with people, to speak openly, to make difficult phone calls, to open up to people and to ignite feelings that you crave and wish you could have all the time.
All those horrible feelings that you have, which you don’t like, don’t choose and (very often) might not even realise are there – these all impact your core belief about yourself. With a core belief system that is not operating in a healthy way, you may find yourself turning to cocaine as the ‘fun time’, which is not all that fun (after the feelings of being good enough pass).
During cocaine use – euphoria, confidence, your self-esteem is elevated. Then, an elevated heart rate, increased anxiety, feeling skittish, paranoid and potentially suicidal. Along with the way in which people look at you when you ‘need to go use the toilet again’ or ‘just have hayfever’ (even when there is no pollen in sight). Poor business decisions, bad relationship choices, etc etc etc……
After cocaine use – a bleeding nose (complete with scabs, which have to come out at some stage), horrible coughing by irritated lungs, deeper depression, regrets about your actions and the effects thereof. Wait, there’s more: erratic sleeping patterns and perhaps the need to take medication to dampen the effects of cocaine as a stimulant (such as alcohol, benzodiazepines or opiates – DK to insert link here).
In no time at all, what seemed like the magical cure to a battered sense of self-worth, or maybe just a bit of recreational fun, can lead to poor quality of life. This may happen very quickly (in weeks or months), however, sometimes it may take much longer – 10, even 20 years! At some stage, you will reach the point where cocaine is just not fun anymore. Well, honestly, perhaps it never really was.